Sometimes I feel completely and utterly useless and in all actuality it's all my fault.I also feel like a complete moron sometimes and I really could stop myself from felling so low but I'm to stupid to say the right things or to do the right things instead I fuck up EVERYTHING.Including some of the best friendships I've ever had by simply pissing someone off ,by saying the wrong thing ,or by asking to many questions ,or even by asking to much of someone.But the worst thing of it all is I'm basically in love with this one person and he in no way shape or form fells even the slightest way I do.And no matter what I do to prevent my self from felling this low I do anyway.And I even prepare my self for when he doesn't call and he doesn't pick up when I call him but I still feel useless as ever and i know he's not going to care about me but I can't help but be this stupid and this pitiful.and I this person I've know him for an entire year and not ONCE has he ever called me I allays have to call him and earlier I asked him If I didn't call for a while how long would it be before you called me? and he said a few weeks a few weeks that could be a month or more so I got to thinking if we got into a REALLY bad argument and I actually was depressed enough to kill my self(Which I'm Not)and I did he may never know and if he did find out it wouldn't be until maybe a month or more after I was gone.